A motion to update the community noticeboard has been tabled indefinitely, pending determination of who owns the community noticeboard.

The board has stood outside the hall for thirty-one years. No minutes record its installation, no budget line covers its upkeep, and no person will admit to having a key.

“Somebody replaces the perspex,” said committee member Dulcie Farrand. “It gets replaced. We do not know by whom.”

The Institute for Undocumented Infrastructure reports that most communities contain at least one object of unknown provenance which continues to function without oversight.

“These objects are maintained by a resident acting alone, for reasons they have never explained and would find embarrassing to explain,” said Dr. Anwyn Prosser. “Identifying them ends the arrangement immediately.”

The board currently displays a lost cat notice from 2019, a fire safety card that has faded to lilac, and an advertisement for a dance class in a hand nobody recognises.

The cat was found. The notice remains, because removing it would require authority, and authority is the subject of the motion.

Committee has appointed a working group to establish ownership. The working group has met twice and has produced a notice, which it cannot display.