A personal water bottle has reached a size at which it can no longer be carried alongside its owner and must instead be accommodated.

The vessel holds two point two litres, weighs slightly more than a small dog, and has occupied the passenger seat since June.

“It’s about intention,” said owner Wilhelmina Sturrock. “When you carry it, you drink it.”

Sturrock has not emptied the bottle since purchase. It has been refilled four times, each time before it was empty, in a practice the Institute for Declared Hydration calls topping up the intention.

“The large bottle is not a container. It is a statement of a plan,” said Dr. Absalom Reyes. “Consumption is not the objective. Visibility is.”

Institute research indicates that owners of bottles above two litres drink no more water than owners of ordinary glasses, but carry it fourteen times further.

The bottle features time markings along its side, each accompanied by an encouraging phrase. Sturrock reports she is presently four hours behind schedule and has been since the second week.

“It says ‘You’ve got this’ at eleven o’clock,” she said. “I don’t, and I resent being addressed by an object.”

The bottle now travels with a carrying handle, a straw, and a small dedicated cleaning brush that has never been used and never will be.