Residents have adopted a parking resolution that creates four spaces, removes nine, and is described by its authors as a net clarification.

The measure passed after a two-hour session in which the word “obviously” was used forty-one times.

“Everyone agreed the situation was intolerable,” said committee secretary Auden Whitlock. “The intolerable situations differed.”

Under the resolution, parking is permitted on the north side on odd days, the south side on even days, and neither side on the day the bins go out, which several residents have calculated falls on both.

The Bureau of Kerbside Affairs notes that such schemes reliably survive because no one can prove they are being violated.

“Enforcement requires a person with a calendar standing outside at dawn,” said Bureau analyst Dr. Ottavia Bruch. “No community has ever produced this person, though every community believes a neighbour is willing.”

Three residents have already parked in the removed spaces, which remain painted, signed, and visibly parking-shaped.

The committee will revisit the matter next month under the agenda item “clarification of the clarification.”